He Pitches Like He Fucks, Sorta All Over The Place
I regret to inform you that the Ponce de Leon fall baseball season has begun, so I can regale you with details of the games.
This season began where last season left off in that our stagnant offense wasn’t able to help out decent pitching and defense (again, by Ponce standards), and we lost 8-3. What’s very astounding about the game is that it lasted only 2 hours and 20 minutes. Usually, we’re lucky if a Ponce game can go the full nine innings within the three hour time limit.
I was the starting pitcher, and I gave up four runs, three earned over five innings. Because it was the first game, it took me a little while to feel comfortable on the mound and I felt erratic in the first two innings. I settled down and retired the side in the fourth and fifth innings.
In going 1-for-3 at the plate, I executed a perfect hit-and-run play during one of my at-bats, hitting the ball toward where the second baseman would be when he went to cover the bag. Unfortunately, it did not lead to a run because they were able to retire the next batter.
Good news for those who are bored with baseball stories. I will be missing the next two games because of the aforementioned beach vacation, so enjoy the brief reprieve.
This season began where last season left off in that our stagnant offense wasn’t able to help out decent pitching and defense (again, by Ponce standards), and we lost 8-3. What’s very astounding about the game is that it lasted only 2 hours and 20 minutes. Usually, we’re lucky if a Ponce game can go the full nine innings within the three hour time limit.
I was the starting pitcher, and I gave up four runs, three earned over five innings. Because it was the first game, it took me a little while to feel comfortable on the mound and I felt erratic in the first two innings. I settled down and retired the side in the fourth and fifth innings.
In going 1-for-3 at the plate, I executed a perfect hit-and-run play during one of my at-bats, hitting the ball toward where the second baseman would be when he went to cover the bag. Unfortunately, it did not lead to a run because they were able to retire the next batter.
Good news for those who are bored with baseball stories. I will be missing the next two games because of the aforementioned beach vacation, so enjoy the brief reprieve.
posted by DC-Giant at 11:46 AM
1 Comments:
Because I am convinced that I represent the 20% of Giant's 5 readers that is stupefyingly bored by throw-by-throw discussions of a 35-and-over hack baseball league (and bad analogies to sexual performance), let me say that, on behalf of that 20%, have a great vacation! Extend for a week if you'd like! Whatever happened to pick up hoops and poker nights? Why don't we ever get overly detailed, patience-trying descriptions of every inhale and exhale like we do from the pitcher's mound at PDL (new name - Pretty Damn Lame) Baseball?
And another thing. If this profanity in the title doesn't stop, I will use the new "flag" feature on blogspot to notify of objectionable content. I'd hate to think that my impressionable daughters (the oldest one last week asked me "Daddy what does fuck mean"? - I swear she didn't hear it from me, must be those damn Hungarians she hangs around with), who already have enough to contend with (see above parenthesis) would accidentally become exposed to this filth just because someone carelessly bookmarks this page and forgets to shut down Windows. So, clean up your act. You're worse than John Rocker.
Plus, how the hell is it that a mere 2 months after the previous season ended, we're back again with this crap? This is more interminable than an NBA season.
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