Karl, Make Sure They Name One After Me

Encouraged by reports that the recent surge in job growth was due in part to repairing extensive hurricane damage, President Bush today commissioned the National Weather Service and the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) to study ways to create more hurricanes.

White House spokesperson Scott McClellan told reporters today, "This should demonstrate to the American people that this Administration is committed to growing jobs. We identify areas where job growth is occurring and pursue those opportunities aggressively."

NOAA Administrator Navy Vice Admiral Conrad C. Lautenbacher, whose agency also is in charge of the National Weather Service, expressed support for the President's idea and said they would study the idea intently.

Vice Admiral Lautenbacher explained that hurricanes are low pressure areas that form over warm ocean waters, so NOAA would have to study ways to import warm ocean waters or develop a large water-proof generator that would heat the ocean waters off the Atlantic Coast.

Off the record, Vice Admiral Lautenbacher said of the President, "God, what a moron."